


She's yours

by LouiseFox



Series: Wasted Love [2]
Category: Fate: The Winx Saga (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M, I'm Bad At Tagging, Magical Pregnancy, My First Work in This Fandom, Out of Character, This Is STUPID, Unplanned Pregnancy, farah is gay but also not, i don't know what this is, saul loves her
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-16 06:46:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29820984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LouiseFox/pseuds/LouiseFox
Summary: This story is what happens when a sudden rush of creativity strikes me, mixed without the ability to actually be able to write.I really don't know what this is. In case it is horrible just ignore it, don't tell me. I'm insecure af.English is not my first language. Originally posted on Wattpad. @TheEchoingGreen
Relationships: Farah Dowling/Rosalind, Farah Dowling/Saul Silva
Series: Wasted Love [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2192784
Comments: 12
Kudos: 36





	She's yours

Farah couldn't do more but to keep herself distracted, keep herself working until there was nothing left but a dull headache and the tiredness in every part of her body. Not doing something made her feel week, as if she let herself go. She couldn't be unproductive, not now.

Especially not now when all her thoughts were about one thing, when she couldn't do more but to worry and to panic.

But as long as she worked, as long as she drowned herself in exhausting things that shouldn't even be her duty she was fine. So she lifted another pile of dusty books, put them up on one of the selves.

In the library there had been left this huge mess of books and cards and magical objects, just laying around and threatening everyone to walk there.

Rosalind would have laughed at her as she stood there, covered in sweat and dust, trying to get some system in here.

She would have told her to find someone to do the dirty work for her.

She wasn't Rosalind. They were not alike at all. She was soft, she cared about people and she wanted everything to be nice for everyone. While the former headmistress only wanted what her own heart desired even if that meant to break the world.

"Farah."

She watched as Saul stood near the door. When did he come in?

"What are you doing here?"

"Cleaning up, isn't that obvious?", she huffed dryly, "Rosalind left a mess in here. I need to get it cleaned up."

With big steps he crossed the room, stood now before her and reached for her arms before she could reach after the next pile of books.

"Slow down. We have time. You've been so busy since-", there was a pause. Then he continued, letting his sentence hang between them, "You drown yourself in so much work, you're doing more than anyone else."

How could see possibly tell him what was going on, how she felt? He was her best friend, one of the people she knew she could trust. In fight he had always held her back, assured she wouldn't be hurt. Still she felt the need to protect herself and keep quiet.

"And? I- we need to make sure this school is ready until next semester. Next week, to remind you. I'm just doing what needs to be done."

Silva shook his head and sat down on one dust covered chair, crossing his arms. To argue with Farah could become exhausting. The fairy could be very stubborn, not wanting to listen to anyone but herself.

"You look pale Farah. Please, sit down and talk to me."

She hesitated but at the end sighed, put a last book back into the shelve before she took a seat next to him.

The brunette fairy wiped some strands of hair out of her face.

"Something is wrong.", he stated, reaching for a hand of hers.

Farah bite her lip. He knew she did it when something was on her mind and she had to control herself to not blurt it out, because she never did. She was the perfect picture of someone who had themself under control no matter what. Someone without emotions and with a mind able to navigate themself out of every situation.

"Goddamnit Farah", he looked away, couldn't bear it to watch her a moment longer. Sometimes he hated this lack of trust. He wished she would see how much he actually cared. "I know you're lying when you say it's nothing, I know you try to distract yourself with all your strength." With a sound like a deep sigh he got up and crossed the room, stood at the window. Looked outside.

"Silva.", she followed him with her eyes. "I..."

"Yeah. You.", he crossed his arms, "Is it because of Rosalind?"

The name hurt him in so many ways. Her fucking Farah was only one of these things. He had tried to show her how much she meant to him. He would give everything up to keep her safe, to make sure she was happy. Still the new headmistress chose Rosalind. And now her heart was broken.

"You are so smart", he muttered, "How could you have been so foolish to choose her?"

"Haven't we all been foolish?! Haven't we all followed her- what do you care who I love or don't love?"

"Do you even know what love is, Farah?", he would regret asking later, but in this tumult deep in his heart he couldn't stop himself. "You are so cold. You push me away when I want nothing more but to be there for you."

Farah shook her head, stood up and joined him at the window. "I don't know what love is. But you and me, it could never work."

Saul gritted his teeth. "How could you know that?"

"I know it Saul. I could never love you." It wasn't true. She could, she knew it, she did, but breaking his heart because she couldn't be what he wanted wasn't right.

She wanted Rosalind, wanted her to be nice, and friendly, and at her side where she could love her for the rest of eternity. Not locked up in this damn magical dungeon under her office. But she couldn't have that.

"But I can love you Farah. I can be there for you. I want to be at your side.", he reached for her hands and she didn't move away. She stayed and allowed him to slowly pull her closer.

It was a mess, and she didn't know what she should feel.

"I want Rosalind", she sobbed, knowing it wasn't her, knowing it were just her emotions. She couldn't think rational now, it just wasn't possible.

"I know.", he kissed her forehead, "But we both know it's not possible."

*

It took Farah two weeks, but she made up her mind. She needed to give him this chance, not because it was what she really wanted, but she knew the feeling of loving someone she couldn't have, someone who manipulated her constantly.

It made her sick to think about how willingly she had followed the former headmistress.

Saul was gentle with her and she thought it wasn't so bad after all. But she couldn't trust him still. So she continued to keep quiet until she couldn't anymore.

"Silva."

They were laying together in her bed, legs intertwined and her head resting on his shoulder. It was nice actually, but she didn't feel what she felt with Rosalind. Rosalind had been different, with her she felt complete. But maybe she just thought so. Probably the other woman had just made her believe she did.

What Saul gave her was real, but it wasn't the same. She wondered what love actually was. Did she even know it?

"Farah?" He gently kissed her head.

It made her smile after all, made her blush, and feel something deep down in her stomach. It was nice. Still. He wasn't Rosalind.

"I'm pregnant."

A long silence followed. She felt him tense, but he didn't let go of her. Instead he held her a little tighter and watched her.

"...how?"

She looked up at him. The confusion on his face was pretty clear and in another situation she would have laughed at it.

"Farah? Talk to me. You owe me that."

Slowly he brushed his hand over her cheek. This was wrong, she needed Rosalind. Not Saul, no matter what he thought to feel for her, or what she thought to feel for him. Tears threatened to form in her eyes. Why was he so soft? What after this information he still laid there, gentle with her, waiting.

But she knew he wouldn't be forever. He waited ten minutes in silence, still keeping her in his arms. Yet Farah couldn't find the courage to say something.

"Fuck you Farah!", barely before he had raised his voice in front of her. "You- you told me you never had a man before me! How could it be-"

"Rosalind.", her voice was barely more than a whisper.

"Have I missed something or since when can two women manage to get each other pregnant?!"

"Saul.", she closed her eyes and sighed, resting her head again on his chest. "Please don't shout."

"...I...I just don't understand this Farah."

She couldn't help but to start sobbing again. He just wasn't her and he would never be. And she hated herself for not being able to be satisfied with him even though he was a wonderful person, able to give her what she needed.

It took her another ten minutes to be able to say something again. "She used a spell. I...I think It was more to her amusement than actually intended. But it worked. After all she is fucking powerful."

He shook his head. "Oh Farah...I...you can be so naive, do you know that?"

"I know."

She actually did. So foolish and naive and now it couldn't be changed anymore. How should she even explain this to anyone?

"If you want me to Farah...I...I will say it's mine. You don't need to worry, I don't mind. I could help you-"

"No.", she couldn't do this anymore. Rosalind. Not Silva. "No", she repeated, shaking her head, "I...I won't keep her."

"...her?"

"It's a girl. But I can't. Not in this world, not like this. I need to concentrate on this school, forget about Rosalind and carry on."

This time she met misunderstanding in his eyes. "But Farah-"

"No Saul. I'm sorry. I know you would do everything for me, but no. Not this. I...I have found a family. Non-magical, she just can't know it. I...I know she will have powers, great powers. And I can't risk raising her here."

"So you're planning to just abandon this child Farah? To make her live with normal people, grow up without knowing how to control her powers?"

Farah looked away. It wasn't his right to make her feel bad about it, to question her decision. "Saul. It is what I decided to do."

It would have been different with Rosalind. With a Rosalind who really loved her and didn't play fucking games with spells and her body, laughing, saying it wouldn't work anyways. Good joke Rosa, good joke.

But Rosalind didn't love her anyways. It would have come to this anyways.

*

Saul didn't speak about it again. He just stayed with her and let her do what she did, because Farah was smarter than most of them and was able to look at the big whole, she could see things they didn't think about. And if it was her decision he wouldn't try to talk her into something because she needed only to be pushed a little over the edge to cast everyone out of her life again.

*

Farah couldn't stop thinking about how wrong this was. Rosalind, not Saul. She should hold her hand and stroke her hair and tell her it would be fine, because it was her fault, she had put her into this because she thought it was funny. Because she liked to play with her wishes and desires.

But time helped her love Silva. He was something she never had, and she came to understand that this was what love should be.

But Rosalind was still there.

And when he slept with her when he was inside her she thought about Rosalind. When their lips met she thought about Rosalind.

It was just now, as she laid there, being in pain and feeling afraid as she had never been before she didn't think about Rosalind. Saul. Only Saul as he stood there at her side through it all.

It could already be felt in the air how powerful the child actually was.

After all she felt proud because this had been Rosalind and her magic. Rosalind, her powerful Rosalind. But she was evil and cold as stone.

Farah couldn't bring herself to hold the child. She just couldn't. But Saul did with a smile. For a moment she wished he could talk her into keeping the child. Maybe they could have managed to make a happy family, he sure is good with children. He showed it every day with Sky. But she had made her mind. It was the smartest thing to do.

So once again she had to lock her feelings up - just like Rosalind. Beloved Rosalind - and pretend she was something better, something without emotions. Someone able to lead them all and help them out. The last months have been rest enough. She couldn't allow herself more.

*

She looked like Rosalind when she had been young. But her hair was so different, it glowed in this colour that was neither hers, nor the other woman's. But this power, it couldn't be something else than their magic combined.

*

"She's mine.", it was a statement. Proudness in Rosalind's voice as they sat together on this bench. "I knew it the moment I first saw her. She looks like me, but she has your look on her face when she wants something. When she craves to have information that weren't made for her ears."

Farah just stared back at her, unable to say something.

"Oh Farah, did you really thing I didn't know?"

Her stomach dropped thinking about it. Rosalind couldn't know. Because she herself had said she didn't believe in this kind of magic.

"I am the most powerful fairy the world has ever seen." Rosalind tilted forwards. Her lips near on her ear. Whispering seductively, making her body tingle.

"No, Rosa.", Farah shook her head, pushing the soft hand away that rested on her thigh. Too near where she craved her to be. Where she hadn't been in so many years. "Our child is far more powerful than you'll ever be."


End file.
